limewire im back

well while limewire downloads ill fill you all in on my night/day.
before sarah picked me up me and brad were talking and then he got angry at me cause i couldnt get him invited to sams 18th. gahhhhhhhh he is so frustrating. when sarah picked me up kitty and dylan were in the car as well :) we got there and mitchiddy grub met us at the gate. sams house is sooooooooo nice. i only knew like sam, mitch, kitty, dylan, sarah and ben when i got there so i was semi antisocial until later in the night. after my four drinks (omg btw mum actually brought me my alcohol :0 stoaked aye) and half a pain killer (bad bec) i was pretty happy :) tom, aaron, reiss came and i introduced myself to more people thats names ive completely forgotten. mitch gave me more drinks (jack daniels) so then i started dancing and singing :) my throats rather sore now. then theres a massive blank spot between then and me and ben kissing :( stupid bec. but i told him i didnt want to do anything cause i was still dating brad. so we went back to the group. another blank spot and then im telling sarah and sarah that i like luke. and tom. stupid stupid bec. they were completely stoaked and pretty much ran off to tell tom. and sarah likes camille :) so i dont feel as bad about semi liking luke. more blank and then it was me kissing tom :( stupid stupid stupid bec. and i wasnt pulling back. he is an amazing kisser. so we were kissing pretty much anytime we were together. then we went for a walk and had some rough and tumble fun as tom put it :) i stopped him before it went too far and told him that i wanted to wait until id broken up with brad. i think there was some discussion about next weekend and seeing how things go :S its not that i wouldnt like to date tom, that would be great, i just am clearly not good at the whole dating thing. and i dont want to hurt him. and then theres nutter as well. im not sure how shes going to take the news that we hooked up. she doesnt have any right to be angry at me but you never know with nutter. so we went back to the group and to my surprise we hadnt been as sneaky as i thought. but oh well :) but i feel really bad cause i think ben was a bit cut :( after chilling some more it was time for bed. me and tom were cuddling then he said he had to go home for something but hed be back (tom lives up the road from sam). i got a text a while later saying that he couldnt come back cause his parents were going crazy cause toms brother drank too much. so i slept on my own on the concrete freaking floor. the sarahs got nick to pick them up and drop one of the sarahs at her house and the other sarah stayed at nicks.
this morning i chilled with the boys for a bit before a guy whose name i cant remember dropped me at the plaza at 10. ive never felt as bad as i did this morning. i was so sure i was going to be sick. i went and visited sarah and we chatted about our nights. i found out it was her that set me and tom up. she said something about him trying to get with me and he was like no i tried at nicks party and she didnt go for it and sarahs like trust me tom trust me. so he was actually trying to get with me on two separate nights :0 that makes things lots more complicated. but oh well. the work which was horrible cause there was like a million of customers today. and jim was in and he always scares me. then home and me and brad talked for a bit. now me and mum are watching burn after reading.

so yes to wrap it up i think that i like tom more than luke but i dont want to date either of them. not like either of them would date me anways. and im hopefully seeing brad tomorrow and finding out what the go is. regardless if he cheated on me or not im breaking up with him. i dont know if im going to tell him about tom. i know that i should but i dont want him to hate me. and im never drinking while on pain killers again. ever.

well im extremely tired so ill leave it there.
xx