woodford

I'm so upset that I'm not going. Did I mention this? Yeah I'm hoping to move out by January 14th so I'm going to need about a grand. Woodford would mean spending roughly $400 and missing one of the busiest weeks of work. So yeah, no Woodford :( I am beyond devestated. And now I'm sitting in my room listening to Paul Dempsey. Not good. And even worse I'm thinking about the weekend. Really not good. 

Friday night we went to Marks for drinks. I found out Ron Ron had told Tom about Brae. Then they both realised who Brae was and they weren't impressed. Me and Tom talked about everything and we decided it wasn't awkward :) Ron Ron kept on trying to make it awkward and we just didn't care. Tom talked to me about how he's stressing that next year is going to be a bad year. Ron Ron and Tom have this thing where one of them will have a good year and the other will have a bad year. Two years ago Tom had sex with Tash and many other bad things happened. Ron Ron just had a ball of a year, got laid the most etc. etc. This year Ron Ron got mugged, hasn't had sex in eight months, drunk drove over someone and therefore lost his license and was fired. This year Tom started uni, turned 18, his sex life improved etc. etc. So Tom thinks its his turn next year. He's also found a place to stay when he moves to Brisbane. The boys were being pretty mean about where me and Sarah Jean want to move. She was getting stressed :( Tom spent the entire night trying to convince me to have sex with him. It was kind of nice to be desired like that but I didn't really want to cause of Brae and everything. When we got back to my house Tom claimed a spot on my bed, then eventually Sarah Jean and Ron Ron went to the other room to sleep. Tom was actually really sweet about it he let me think about it and didn't push me. I thought it over and decided it was okay because I'm going to miss being single once I'm in a relationship. It was pretty good :) it was a little weird though cause whenever he looked at me (there isn't enough light to see properly normally) he would get this really awkward look on his face and look away. Is my orgasm face that bad? I don't feel guilty that I did it but I feel guilty that I don't feel guilty if that makes sense?
On Saturday morning I found out that Sarah Jean and Ron Ron had a bet going about whether me and Tom would have sex. Sarah Jean owed Ron Ron a Maccas meal. Work was pretty good, I've started liking Taryn a little more and I was working with Katie and Chloe. Taryn was a tool at the end of the day though she forgot to give us keys to lock up the shop when she left. Tool. That night we went to Marks again for cocktail night :) man that was a drunken night. All I could drink for $15... challenge accepted. Yeah so don't really remember much. Ron Ron was trying to teach me poker. Failed miserably. I got with Tom again but it was just when they were about to go clubbing. Drunken me was undeterred and attempted to blow Tom on the drive way. When everyone was at the bottom of the drive way. I think I just broke the slut scale. Oh well. Then me and Brae were texting. This is how it went.
Me: How do you feel about me?
Brae: Hopefully the same way you feel about me
Me: That's not an answer?!
Brae: You already know I really like you
Me: Like me like that way?
Brae: I'm not sure what way you mean, but I mean in the best possible way
Me: That's still not a proper answer. Which kind of like?
Brae: I don't know how to word it, I wanna say love but I don't wanna get it all wrong and have you stop talking to me
Me: I would never stop talking to you :) loves a pretty powerful word...?
Brae: Like I said, didn't know how to word it
Me: Wow
Brae: What?
Me: I expected you to use the whole I love you... as a friend line
Brae: Did I make a mistake?
Me: No, not at all
Brae: Do I still get to see you tomorrow?
Me: Of course!
Brae: :) that's a relief
Me: Aww don't stress!
Brae: I'm trying not to haha
Me: Well nothing you could say would make me want to avoid you or whatever

So I probably should have reacted better to him telling me he loved me. Fail. And I definetly should have said that I like him back. Epic fail. 

Sunday me and Brae were meant to hang out but then he was shitty so he went wakeboarding. Then tonight he talked to me and asked if we could hang out tomorrow. I don't get it?! Boys are so confusing! So yeah we're hopefully hanging out tomorrow. I'm going to ask him out :) gosh I'm so nervous, I feel very... schoolgirl. Also I've decided that I'm not aloud to get more than tipsy if I'm not around Brae. I'm not going to hurt him, I don't care if that means that my weekends have to get quieter. And also it gives me more insentive to get Brae invited to my parties :) 

Well I'm going to try to calm down now and go to sleep.
Wish me luck!
xx